As I reflect on the earlier periods of my life, I am deeply aware of how much others have contributed to shaping the person I have become. In my formative years, my mother and grandmother played a vital role in nurturing my character, instilling values, and guiding me toward faith and maturity. 

I have much in common with Timothy, the young evangelist and protégé of the apostle Paul, to whom Paul wrote:

“I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well.” (2 Timothy 1:5).

Coincidentally, my grandmother’s name was also Lois. She passed from this life in the final days of last year. My mother selflessly cared for her during her long and difficult decline in health.

The wisdom, sacrifice, and love of the godly women in my life laid a foundation upon which my whole life has been built. Yet, beyond my family, many others have played a significant role in my development.

Teachers in school imparted knowledge and discipline, fostering a love for learning and critical thinking. Leaders in the church instilled spirituality and piousness. The parents of my friends and peers extended hospitality, offering meals, giving me rides to school, and welcoming me into their homes for dinners and other gatherings.

These were not merely moments of companionship, but of profound moral and character formation. I often think back on all they did for me, and I long to express my gratitude for their kindness and godly influence. For many of them, this would now be very difficult. 

Time has passed, lives have taken new directions, and I have lost contact. I long to show gratitude to these missing individuals.

         Searching for them on social media or online is usually futile—like looking for a needle in a haystack. For others, my expressions of gratitude are utterly impossible, since they have already passed from this life. These realizations leave me with no small dissatisfaction. 

If only I could tell each one who blessed my life how much I cherish their generosity and influence! If only I could speak to them one last time on this side of eternity! And yet, I take comfort in knowing that while I may be unable to express my thanks personally, God knows my heart. 

He sees the gratitude I hold for those who have poured goodness into my life, and He remembers everything. He knows that I desire to be like them, as they also imitated the Lord who blessed them immeasurably. As Paul instructed,

“Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ.” (1 Corinthians 11:1).

Though I cannot repay all those who have blessed me, I can give thanks to the One who orchestrated their role in my life. I can pray that their kindness will be credited to them in eternity, and that their reward will be great in heaven. As Scripture declares,

“For God is not unjust so as to overlook your work and the love that you have shown for his name in serving the saints, as you still do.” (Hebrews 6:10).

I do not intend to diminish the importance of expressing gratitude to others while we still have the chance. A word of thanks, a letter, or a gesture of appreciation is always a powerful way to bless those who have blessed us. But for those whom we can no longer reach, we trust God’s perfect remembrance. In any event, he sees, he cares, and he will reward every good thought and intention of our hearts.

Let us then be grateful for the missing, not only in words but in the way we live, passing on the kindness shown to us so that others may experience the same grace that once shaped us. And let us rest in the assurance that God, in His faithfulness, will return abundant blessings to the thankful heart.

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” (1 Thessalonians 5:18).

 

 

–Michael Hildreth is a Christian Counselor in Abilene, TX.