In June, I will have completed 30 years of full-time preaching.  During those years, I have found myself in quite a few interesting situations.  Those who think the life of a preacher must be stuffy and boring need to spend some time with me.  I thought I’d share a few fun and not so fun experiences over the past 30 years.

• I once baptized a young man in a creek, but before I put him under, I went under myself as the bottom of the creek bed suddenly disappeared.
• I followed a rather short man in my first located work.  I never thought about needing to buy new baptismal waders.  So at my first baptism, I attempted to stuff my size 13 feet into a size 9 boot and my “XL” self into a “M” pair of waders.  My toes were curled under and the suspenders were pulled as tight as they would go.  So when I bent over to baptize the lady, the suspenders could take no more, snapping in the back, and shooting like a slingshot over my shoulders.
• I once led a funeral procession to the grave site.  As we walked to the grave, a frog jumped across our path and nearly everyone in the procession, except the pall bearers, took off after that frog, falling all over the ground trying to catch it.  Also, before the burial was finished, two of the “mourners” got into a fist fight.
• A member of the church where I once preached had a “secret hide-out” in the crawl space under our house until we discovered it.  He had flashlights, reading materials, and a pretty cozy setup under our bedroom floor.
• I had a man show up at church one day and tell me that God told him that he was to be my new associate minister and he wanted to know where his office would be.  I told him that until God confirmed the hire with me, it was no deal.
• My sermons have been disrupted by emergency personnel at least a dozen times due to someone fainting, or having a heart-attack.
• My “trip of a lifetime” nearly ended in tragedy when a lady stumbled into me when I was standing at the edge of the Arbel Cliffs overlooking the Sea of Galilee.
• I’ve been praised  for some sermons, ignored for others, and nearly skinned alive for yet others.  And sometimes, I’m not sure which is which like when a lady met me at the door after I preached a sermon on Hell and she said, “Steve, I want you to know that I didn’t know what Hell was like until I heard you preach.”
• I’ve been privileged to preach in 5 countries and 22 states.
• I’ve had a gun pointed at my head while preaching at a church in AL.  I was threatened to be shot by an abusive husband of one of our members in WV.  A man once threatened to burn my house down in KY.  I have been threatened to be beaten up five times.  I once had my office burglarized by a man whom I surprised while he was still in my office.  He was dressed in army fatigues, had a “Duck Dynasty” beard, and was mumbling something about murder…I gave him what money I had in my wallet.  (All that from a guy who hates confrontation).

If I had it all to do over again, would I change anything?  Of course I would!  What kind of nut do you think I am! But would I change my decision to spend my life preaching the gospel?  Absolutely not!  I love preaching.  I love my brethren. And I love the Lord who has sustained me for the past 30 years.

 

                               Steve Higginbotham is minister of the Karns Church of Christ, Knoxville, TN.